Prayer of return: compost

Thank you for the feast-
invitation to go
deep into the roots of
Yahweh.
All the way
into the recesses
of why...

Both a question,
and a fledgling
nudge to
climb into the expansive limbs of
Who You are.
But I hear your heartbeat echo
when I am down here midst the roots.

Thank You for the feast
journey compost
turned, and
turned again
to rich, brown
worm earth.
Dust and living water.

Thank You

jfig     1/2022




A bit about prayers of return: My soul friend asked me, “Where are you returning from?” Good question. Places of doubt, skewed theology, giant looming questions. Places like dinosaur exhibits – things that look like they shouldn’t be real but are. On my worst days – willful disobedience. Busyness – days when it is sheer delight to step into the safe Presence of Yahweh and remember, this is home. Always, the welcome is the same. This is home.

Psalms 27, 32 and 84 talk about making God one’s refuge, a home with Him. You can access those readings easily here:

“Psalm 27 (NIV) – Of David. The LORD is.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 23 Jan, 2022. https://www.blueletterbible.org/niv/psa/27/1/s_505001.

And finally, John 14: 23 “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.” This, friend, is an epic journey…

Scripture quoted is from the Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

On Our Knees

On Our Knees

We were not meant to know this evil.

We are on our knees
trying to stem the tide
of that which we were not
meant to know.
hands inept—ravaged and torn.

We were not meant
to bear in tender flesh
such intimate knowledge:
evil's searing pain,
prolonged stench of indelible ash.

This knowledge would betray us.

We grabbed the limbs of self-deception
eager to climb her rungs
shaking loose like pollen
clouds of arrogance, brutality
convoluted delusions of entitlement.

Voracious we climb. Why???

Still we are on our knees
intention desperate
flood held— just shy of our consumption
by unhidden promise
stretched out before Noah

And kept.

We have been meant, always
to wear the knowledge of God's Presence—garden green
but sadly trade  for sheep's clothing
choosing, still.
We are the wolves.

Set down thy thirst and fisted fork!
BEHOLD the deeds of the Lord
see the work of his hands—
they, too, are naked and torn.
We are on our knees...

jfig    4/2021

For months, with so many of you, I have listened to cries of distress across our nation and asked, What is wrong with our humanity? Probed the more puzzling question,  How did we get here, still? And wrestled with the disturbing, How am I complicit? I find myself begging for hope that will reach beyond my own boundaries and capacity. The title “On Our Knees” comes from this hint of desperation.  Our collective answers to these questions appear to fall far short of understanding; and the days appear to grow darker… My thoughts return again and again to these passages: Genesis 2 and Isaiah 5. Genesis 2 which describes Eve reaching for what she thinks is an edible fruit, but missing the end of the sentence…  She misses it again in Genesis 3, when Satan clearly states,  ” Your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil(emphasis mine).”  Oh, how we want to be like God; in control and power and knowing. “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate…“1  And Isaiah 5  – a detailed litany of our continuing misguided appetites. I like Isaiah 5 because it does not tell me that I am all wrong. It tells me, because you do this, you still hunger and thirst. It gives me a list from which to choose; and I only have to absorb in my skin, the woe over which I trip. From its core, Isaiah 5 is also actionable. These passages have provided space from which to begin to understand what I see, feel, hear. Slowly, this reflection is beginning to shed light on where I act entitled, in my interactions with neighbors and friends, in the check-out line and with my spouse… I have friends who are convinced they play no part in systemic racism. I understand—it is frightening to consider the ramifications.

Self deception has no respect for color. We have poured in buckets of every hue imaginable. I believe it is important to ask ourselves the disturbing questions. Midst much chaos, it has helped to have some sense of where to begin.  I hope you find these passages helpful as well.

Bravely, jfig

1) Genesis 3:16,17. The Holy Bible, ESV 2001 by Crossway, Wheaton, IL. (www.esvbible.org)

Genesis 2:9,16-17; 2:25; Genesis 3:5-6

Isaiah 5, particularly 8-24

Genesis 2:16-17  But the LORD God warned him, “You may freely eat the fruit of every tree in the garden—except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die.”

“Genesis 2 (NLT) – So the creation of the.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 24 Apr, 2021. <https://www.blueletterbible.org/nlt/gen/2/1/p1/s_2001&gt;.

Isaiah 5:12b “but they do not regard the deeds of the Lord, or see the work of his hands.”

“Isaiah 5 (ESV) – They have lyre and harp.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 24 Apr, 2021. <https://www.blueletterbible.org/esv/isa/5/12/p1/s_684012&gt;.

30 Days in Gennesaret: Day 29 Ship’s Log II/Stranded

“After they had crossed the lake, they landed at Gennesaret. They brought the boat to shore and climbed out. The people recognized Jesus at once, and they ran throughout the whole area, carrying sick people on mats to wherever they heard he was. Wherever he went—in villages, cities, or the countryside—they brought the sick out to the marketplaces. They begged him to let the sick touch at least the fringe of his robe, and all who touched him were healed.” Mark 6:53-56 NLT *

Ship’s Log II

Left Gennesaret at dawn.

Too many stories to tell.

We just drifted past a lad

walking on water.

Was that the six-year-old?

I am sure it was he.

 

Stranded

Shattered

got here too late—

accustomed to my sanctuary of pain.

Jesus and his disciples have left

the shore – boat outline

receding in the distance

 

“He gives power to the faint,

and to him who has no might

he increases strength.”

 

There is a question

dropped like a pebble on the sand,

“Who do you say that I am?”

jfig     4/2020

 

**Isaiah 40:29

***Matthew 16:15

Recently, a young man asked me, “You have been a believer in Jesus for a long time. What ‘advice’ would you give to a younger follower like me?”

In your lifetime, Jesus will many times ask you this question, “Who do you say that I am?” This is an invitation…

Be honest with yourself, and with Jesus, when you answer. Life-changing conversation will follow.   jfig

Mark 6:53-56 Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
** ***Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright © 2001, 2007, 2011, 2016 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

You can access scripture passages here: https://www.blueletterbible.org/ This is a terrific site from which to access multiple translations, commentaries and concordance info.

Dear Reading Friends: Thank you. It has been so meaningful to have your company on this 30 day journey. One more day… Thank you for reading, for commenting, for pondering and following along. Over the next 30 days, I plan to stop in and see what you are up to. In all things heavenward, Godspeed. jfig

 

30 Days in Gennesaret: Day 27 Greyscapes

RW pic grey

RW pic grey ponder

Greyscapes

There is a grey space

murky before the dawn

where questions abound broad and deep.

 

Then and now

is there broad definition— heal

measured not in limbs and cells

counted and recounted

but in communion

weighed in hours spent

cloistered in the sanctuary of suffering

naked need – that seed of knowing?

Did God intend that we not know evil

but embrace knowing him?

 

Then and now

which ones fisted the hem

and did not let go

escaping the mortal bounds of earth

for the expanse

of eternity?

Leaving our hearts

half in Gennesaret

half in heaven.

This pain knows no bounds.

But

God’s love cannot

be removed

that which he births

remains.

 

Then and now

now that we have seen Jesus, scourged and resurrected, we

live in a land where it is not the certainty of knowing—

outcomes veiled

but the certainty of journeying

face to face, heart inside of mortal heart

is this healing?

 

“What’s next?” The world is in a situation where this has become almost a universal question? Although I ask myself, has Covid19 really changed anything for those who daily try to survive the extremes of poverty and vulnerability to secondary infections? When my oldest daughter was working in missions, she said to me, “I don’t know why they call it a mission field. In a field you can see a long way. They should call it the mission forest…” This poem is about that – the ‘what next?s’ of Gennesaret and now.

There is a grey space, murky before the dawn, where questions abound broad and deep, but without the insistence of daylight that one discern an answer. It is a safe space in which to contemplate. Space in which Jesus might ask a few questions of his own. The story of Gennesaret whispers a couple of those questions. I do not have the answers. Original sin was seduced by this slithering lie, ” you will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” We don’t have to know all the answers, though I might try some on for size, to see if they fit. The trick is in remembering that the answers have to fit Jesus, not me. He is the one with the healing robe.

jfig     4/2020

Jesus, we love you, for having held our questions for literally centuries, gracing us time  to wrestle, and the offense of misinterpreting/maligning your intent time and time again. There is a hunger deep inside, to know you and have our ‘needs met’ not by what we want, but by who you are. You are the dawn we seek, Holy One. Amen

 

30 Days in Gennesaret: Day 21 Puzzles

When we received confirmation from the genetics clinic, of a diagnosis for our seven year old daughter’s disability, our other children were 11, 13 and 14. They had some questions: “What does this mean?” “Well…if Jesus healed her, would he change everything?”

Puzzles

Where are the disciples? Has anyone seen Thaddeus…Andrew, James, John

? Did any come with leprosy. Who brought them? After how many seasons in quarantine??

? Did some wait sun-up to sun-down and into first light, like refugees, lined up with diseases like displacement and poverty, the adverse experience of terror

? Did Matthew really mean all: he was a numbers keeper, you know:

     “soon the people were bringing all their sick to be healed and all who touched him were healed.”

? Was there a panic, what if I can’t get there in time?

? Did anyone get sunburned, lying in the marketplace.

? What ointment did they have

? Who carried cups of water

https://water.cc/

? What questions did the children ask  ? What answers were they given

? Did people talk to the beggars – or were they considered ‘unclean’ And at the end of the day?

? Did anyone, listening to the stories, sneak away to the harbor,  freshly healed—to attempt walking on water. This I would really like to know…

? Were some taken aback at transformations; others’ ills completely unknown. Not just acquaintances, but family members, friends…

? Were the newly healed, newly clothed. By what method?

I will greatly rejoice in the Lord;
my soul shall exult in my God,
for he has clothed me with the garments of salvation;
he has covered me with the robe of righteousness,
as a bridegroom decks himself like a priest with a beautiful headdress,
and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. Isaiah 61:10 ESV

? what did healing look like. The way things were before, or did God’s kingdom coming in the Healer Jesus bring a new normal

? did old scars go away – the jagged lines disappear

? Does Jesus see me

? Who is He – really…………………………………………………who will I say that He is?

jfig     4/2020

 

“Matthew 14:34 (NLT) – After they had crossed the.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 24 Apr, 2020. <https://www.blueletterbible.org/nlt/mat/14/34/s_943034&gt;.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

“Isaiah 61:10 (ESV) – I will greatly rejoice in.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 24 Apr, 2020. <https://www.blueletterbible.org/esv/isa/61/10/s_740010&gt;.

Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright © 2001, 2007, 2011, 2016 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved

One response that you could make to this post, is to share your heart’s awareness of  the names of organizations/nonprofits that you feel are carrying out the healing ministry of Jesus Christ. Thanks…j